心理科学进展, 2018, 26(12): 2170-2179 doi: 10.3724/SP.J.1042.2018.02170

研究前沿

亲密关系中的自我扩张

赖晓璐, 刘学兰, 黎莉,

华南师范大学心理学院/心理应用研究中心, 广州 510631

Self-expansion in close relationships

LAI Xiaolu, LIU Xuelan, LI Li,

School of Psychology /Center for Studies of Psychological Application, South China Normal University, Guangzhou 510631, China

通讯作者: 刘学兰, E-mail: liuxuelan@m.scnu.edu.cn

收稿日期: 2017-08-5   网络出版日期: 2018-12-15

基金资助: *广东省教育科研规划项目“家庭结构与家庭养育方式对中学生自我意识的影响” .  2010tjk306
广州市人文社科重点研究基地“幸福广州心理服务与辅导基地”资助项目

Received: 2017-08-5   Online: 2018-12-15

摘要

自我扩张理论认为, 人们通过将他人的资源、观点和认同纳入自我来实现自我扩张, 增强完成目标的效能感。该理论作为动机领域的新热点, 研究多以亲密关系为背景。现有研究主要采用实验法和问卷法, 以自我扩张动机和将他人纳入自我为基点展开, 内容涉及择偶、关系质量、不忠、关系破裂和维持等方面。未来研究需进一步考察不同亲密关系类型、关系与非关系中自我扩张的运作机制, 以及亲密关系双方自我扩张的相互作用。

关键词: 自我扩张 ; 亲密关系 ; 关系满意度 ; 不忠

Abstract

Self-expansion theory mentions that people expand themselves by including the others’ resources, perspectives and identities into themselves to improve self-efficacy. As a new important focus of motivation researches, numerous studies have been conducted in the context of close relationships. Furthermore, most of researches about self-expansion are mainly based on self-expansion motivation and inclusion of others in the self, such as mate selection, relationship satisfaction, infidelity, relational dissolution and maintenance, according to the questionnaire and experiment. In the future, we should explore different types of close relationships and the mechanism of self-expansion in and out of close relationships, as well as the mutual effect between couples’ self-expansion.

Keywords: self-expansion ; close relationships ; relationship satisfaction ; infidelity

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本文引用格式

赖晓璐, 刘学兰, 黎莉. (2018). 亲密关系中的自我扩张. 心理科学进展, 26(12), 2170-2179

LAI Xiaolu, LIU Xuelan, LI Li. (2018). Self-expansion in close relationships. Advances in Psychological Science, 26(12), 2170-2179

希腊德尔裴神庙刻着一句至理名言——“人呐, 认识你自己”。你, 是否也认识自己的亲密关系, 似曾想过: 什么样的人更吸引你?为什么会被眼前的人所吸引?分手为什么让人痛不欲生?是什么导致分手?如何挽救破裂的关系?诸如此类问题, 我们都可以从自我扩张模型(Self-expansion Model)中找到答案。该模型是Aron与同事在James (1890/1948)自我意识会包融其他个体这一观点上, 融合唤醒与吸引研究、动机理论以及东方心理学和社会心理学发展而来, 以此回答“人们为什么要发展和维持关系”的问题(Aron & Aron, 1996)。具体而言, 每个人都有自我扩张动机, 人们通过将他人纳入自我来增强自我效能感, 从而更好地实现目标(Aron & Aron, 1986)。作为动机领域的新热点, 自我扩张模型在人际关系、社会比较和戒烟等领域得到了验证(Aron, Steele, Kashdan, & Perez, 2006; Xu, Aron, Westmaas, Wang, & Sweet, 2014)。亲密关系作为自我扩张最重要的实现途径(Aron & Aron, 1997), 西方心理学界已经在该领域开展了自我扩张相关的系列研究, 并取得了丰硕成果, 然而国内研究却非常匮乏。因此, 本文尝试分析自我扩张模型的特点、研究方法, 以及在亲密关系领域的研究和应用, 并与现有理论对比分析, 目的在于综述已有成果, 为今后国内外开展相关研究提供借鉴。

1 自我扩张模型

一般而言, 自我扩张模型分为自我扩张动机和将他人纳入自我两个核心内容, 前者属于动机过程, 后者属于认知过程, 是实现自我扩张动机的方式之一(Aron & Aron, 1996; Aron, Aron, & Norman, 2003)。研究发现, 影响自我扩张的既有依恋(Slotter & Gardner, 2012a)、动机(Mattingly, Mcintyre, & Lewandowski, 2012)、技能(Graham & Harf, 2015)等个体因素, 也有关系质量(Aron & Aron, 1996)、关系长短(Sheets, 2014)、伴侣支持(Fivecoat, Tomlinson, Aron, & Caprariello, 2015)、感知到伴侣的关系满意度(Tomlinson & Aron, 2013)等关系因素。

1.1 自我扩张动机

自我扩张动机指人们具有扩张潜在效能感, 提升能力以实现目标的动机(Xu, Lewandowski, & Aron, 2016)。Aron认为它是我们核心和基本的动机, 其他有关自我的动机(如自我验证、自我提升)都可以归因为自我扩张动机(Aron & Aron, 1996)。与传统动机理论相比, 自我扩张理论主要关注我们对目标的选择, 而非目标对我们的影响(崔剑海, 2013)。根据马斯洛需求理论, 高级需求只在低级需求满足的前提下产生, 而自我扩张动机可以出现在任何时候(贾凤翔, 2012)。目前关于该动机的来源众说纷纭, 有研究者认为自我扩张就像饥饿和口渴一样, 源自神经系统的基本生理需求(White, 1959)。也有研究者认为自我扩张动机部分根源于人们对社会认可和社会接纳的关注(Leary, 2007)。甚至还有研究者结合享乐理论(the hedonic principle), 提出自我扩张根源于接近动机, 当接近动机处于高水平时, 人们对自我扩张的机会特别敏感(Mattingly et al., 2012)。

1.2 将他人纳入自我

将他人纳入自我指处于关系中的人们, 会通过将他人的资源、观念和认同等纳入自我来实现自我扩张(Aron et al., 1991)。“他人”指个人、群体(如Dys-Steenbergen, Wright & Aron, 2016; Turner, Hewstone, Voci, & Vonofakou, 2008)或社区(如Mashek, Cannaday, & Tangey, 2007)。例如, 外组成员能提供具有吸引力的自我成长机会, 促进组间的高质量互动, 提升组员的自我效能感和自我成长感(Dys-Steenbergen et al., 2016)。

将他人的资源纳入自我, “资源”指“物资资料、知识(概念性, 信息性和程序性)及能够推动目标实现的社会资产” (Aron, Mashek, & Aron, 2004)。例如, 使用他人的金钱和车, 接受他人的建议等均属于将他人的资源纳入自我(Ledbetter, Stassen, Muhammad, & Kotey, 2010)。Aron及同事(1991, 实验一)第一个直接验证了将他人的收入纳入自我, 他们让被试把钱分配给自己、好友和陌生人。结果发现, 被试分给好友与自己的金额不相上下, 均大于分给陌生人的金额。

将他人的观念纳入自我, “观念”指“在某种程度上, 从对方的观点中体验(有意识或者无意识)世界” (Aron et al., 2004)。例如, 交谈今天发生的事情, 一起吃饭或玩游戏等均属于将他人的观念纳入自我(Ledbetter et al., 2010)。在相关研究中, 大部分实验设计改编自Lord (1980)的范式。具体而言, 首先向被试呈现一系列的名词, 让他们对每个名词形成特定的形象——某个人物(如自己、亲密他人、非亲密他人)与该名词所表达的物体(如书本)进行互动的场景, 接着让被试完成干扰任务, 随后对这些名词进行自由回忆。

将他人的认同纳入自我, “认同”指“不同于其他人和物体的特征, 主要是特点、记忆和其他将人定位于社会和物理空间的特征” (Aron et al., 2004)。例如, 拥抱、亲吻等身体接触, 表达感情, 给对方取昵称, 管理冲突和讨论未来等均属于将他人的认同纳入自我(Ledbetter et al., 2010)。一般而言, 人们对自我相关的记忆要好于与他人相关的记忆, 但当对象是亲密他人时, 两者记忆差别很小(Symons & Johnson, 1997), 与此同时我们更容易混淆与自己和亲密他人相关的特质(Mashek, Aron, & Boncimino, 2003)。

2 自我扩张在亲密关系领域的研究

2.1 研究内容

2.1.1 择偶

在择偶上, 相似与互补问题争论已久。根据人际吸引理论, 相似性是影响人际关系最重要的因素之一, 人们喜欢兴趣、背景和价值观等相似的人。研究表明, 感知到的相似性能够促进人际吸引(Newcomb, 1961), 尤其是双方的价值观, 相似性越高婚姻关系越满意(Gaunt, 2006)。但实际择偶时所选伴侣与理想偏好可能存在差异, 双方并未表现出人格特质上的相似(Figueredo, Sefcek, & Jones, 2006)。对于这一现象, 自我扩张认为个体选择与自己不相似的人作为伴侣, 是因为他们能带来更多自我扩张的机会(Aron & Aron, 1996), 提供更多新颖资源、观点和认同(Mattingly et al., 2012)。当个体处于关系发展不确定的情境, 倾向于选择与自己相似的人。而当他们处在关系发展可能性高的情境中, 更倾向选择与自己不相似的人(Aron et al., 2006)。

人际吸引中最基本的假设是他人能带来奖赏(Clore & Byrne, 1974), 人们提供的直接奖赏越多, 对我们的吸引力就越强(罗兰·米勒, 丹尼尔·珀尔曼, 2011)。伴侣的观念、生活经验、社会地位等与我们越不相似, 提供的自我扩张机会就越多。由此看来能带来更多自我扩张机会的个体, 对我们也更具有奖赏意义。然而, 并非所有特质都在择偶中起同等作用, 自我扩张理论没有对此进行区分。根据进化理论, 男性在择偶过程中更看重年龄和外貌特征, 并视为是女性多育和健康的象征; 而女性则更看重经济实力, 希望寻找具有经济保障并提供承诺的男性, 以保证后代的健康成长(Buss, 1985; Trivers, 1972)。此外, 对于初婚与再婚群体(Kozieł & Pawłowski, 2003; 邬欣言, 汤林, 2016), 异性恋与同性恋群体(Smith & Stillman, 2002), 网络与现实恋爱群体, 他们在择偶中关注的特质也不尽相同(Strassberg & Holty, 2003; 刘烯琴, 任孝鹏, 2013)。因而相异并不完全相吸, 还取决于双方是否看重这方面的相异之处。

2.1.2 浪漫关系

进入关系后, 个体在自我扩张的作用下会发生诸多变化。首先, 自我扩张会提升我们的自我效能感和自尊, 丰富自我概念(Aron, Paris & Aron, 1995; Mattingly & Lewandowski, 2013a), 同时还会引起认知变化, 由原来的自我聚焦(self-focus)向关系聚焦(relational focus)转变, 将自己与伴侣视为整体(Lin, W. F., Lin, Y. C., Huang & Chen, 2016)。其次, 自我扩张有助于增加伴侣的努力和坚持程度, 提升改善关系的意愿, 从而提高关系质量(Mattingly & Lewandowski, 2013b)。最后, 自我扩张还能促进归属, 增加社会互动(Leary, 2007)。然而, 只有当实际扩张水平与渴望扩张水平相等时, 个体报告的满意度才最高(Aron et al., 2009)。如果一段关系缺乏足够的自我扩张, 个体容易产生厌倦感(Harasymchuk & Fehr, 2010), 增加不忠易感性(susceptibility to infidelity; Lewandowski & Ackerman, 2006)。而过多的将他人纳入自我则会使个体感到被控制或者身份的丧失(Aron et al., 2004)。

2.1.3 不忠与关系破裂

研究表明, 夫妻共同参与活动是维持关系的一大策略, 但仅仅参与愉快性活动效果并不明显, 只有参与兴奋性活动才能增加婚姻满意度, 改善亲密关系(Reissman, Aron, & Bergen, 1993)。自我扩张活动具有新颖性和挑战性特点(Aron et al., 1986), 诸如音乐会、跳舞、帆船和滑雪等(Carson, Carson, Gil & Baucom, 2007)。而洗衣、做饭和带孩子等日常活动, 只要转化为高挑战性和激发性的活动, 也能带来自我扩张(Graham, 2008)。除了活动本身, 婚姻质量改善与否还与自身技能和伴侣支持有关。例如, 如果参与的活动超出自身技能范围, 关系质量反而会下降(Graham & Harf, 2015)。此外, 在活动中获得伴侣积极支持的个体比获得被动支持的个体, 关系质量提升更多(Fivecoat et al., 2015)。与此同时, 我们应相互尊重, 避免参加一方不喜欢但能带来自我扩张的活动(Burris, Rempel, Munteanu & Therrien, 2013)。

平等理论作为关系维持中最具代表性的理论之一(Stafford & Canary, 1991), 其核心是: “在关系中感受到平等的人们, 会付出努力去维持他们的关系” (Stafford & Canary, 2006)。而Aron等人(2004)则认为, 人们通过将他人纳入自我来维持关系。研究发现, 平等理论只能解释部分认知因素, 自我扩张理论的解释范围更广, 能够预测男女大部分的关系维持行为。在统计上, 平等理论对女性的关系维持行为解释性较强, 而自我扩张理论对男性解释性更强(Ledbetter, Stassen-Ferrara & Dowd., 2013)。

2.1.5 小结

自我扩张理论认为伴侣带来的新颖资源、观点和认同能增强我们完成目标的效能感, 当我们在一段关系中得不到满足时, 会在其他地方寻求自我扩张的机会。这类似于社会交换理论的观点, 即人们处理感情的态度是权衡利弊的结果, 我们往往寻求能够通过最小代价换来具有最大奖赏价值的人际交往(Rusbult, Arriaga, & Anew, 2001)。也就是说, 人们利用自身某种优势换取伴侣的另一种优势, 当其他可选伴侣优于当前伴侣时, 个体有离开当前关系的倾向。社会交换理论从经济学角度出发, 以求付出和回报之间的最大利益。自我扩张理论则更多从动机角度解释, 强调关系带来的新颖性和兴奋性。依恋理论认为, 浪漫关系中的情感联结也可以看做是一种依恋关系(Hazan & Shaver, 1987), 个体与伴侣建立爱情的过程就像是早期与抚养者建立依恋关系的过程。一般而言依恋取向主要受以往经验的影响, 由儿时基本需求被满足或受阻程度决定(Knee, Hadden, Porter, & Rodriguez, 2013), 而自我扩张大小则由伴侣当前提供的新颖经验所决定。相对于稳定的依恋内部工作模式(internal working model) (Kirkpatrick & Hazan, 1994), 自我扩张随动机、关系质量和长短等发生变化。进化理论主要关注男女差异和择偶, 忽略了亲密关系建立之后的变化(齐海静, 蔡颖, 2013)。自我扩张理论的关注范围更广泛, 从关系建立到关系破裂与维持均提供了指导性建议。尽管社会交换理论、依恋理论和进化理论作为亲密关系领域的重要理论, 产生了丰硕的研究成果, 但严格上说它们都在其他经典理论的基础上解释关系, 并不属于完全独立的亲密关系理论(齐海静, 蔡颖, 2013)。自我扩张理论作为新兴理论, 从提出开始就根植于亲密关系领域, 这一步对亲密关系的研究具有跨越性意义。

2.2 研究方法

目前关于自我扩张与亲密关系的研究, 多数采用横断设计, 且问卷和实验占主导地位。在问卷方面, 使用最广泛的是自我扩张问卷和将他人纳入自我量表。虽然这些问卷都能测量亲密关系中的自我扩张, 但亲密关系除了恋爱关系与婚姻关系, 还包含亲子关系和朋友关系。目前除了倪莹(2014)编制的大学生自我扩张问卷测量了恋爱关系, 并无其他问卷专门测量亲密关系的具体领域。然而恋爱关系与其他亲密关系带来的自我扩张体验非常不同, 为了推动该领域的发展, 有必要进一步开发其他类型的自我扩张问卷。在实验方面, 不同于问卷法着眼于亲密关系中的自我扩张大小, 实验法的研究主要关注能改善关系的自我扩张活动, 且被试一般使用成对伴侣。

2.2.1 自我扩张动机的研究方法

(3)经验取样法。主要指在现实情境下, 通过设备多次对被试重复测量的数据收集方法(段锦云, 陈文平, 2012)。与问卷法相比, 经验取样法能够减少回顾偏差, 同时还能提高生态效度(Dimotakis, Scott, & Koopman, 2011), 因而备受研究者青睐。例如, Graham (2008)让被试携带个人电子助手(personal digital assistant, PDA)一周, 每天早上8点到晚上10点之间, 每隔2小时定时连线被试。当信号接通时被试需要在2~3分钟内完成问卷, 回答诸如“此刻在干什么”、“和谁在一起”等问题。被试如果有事可以暂停信号, 但在5分钟内没有反应或者超过3分钟回答一道题, PDA将会停止并将该题算作漏答。值得注意的是, 以上测的都是外显自我扩张动机, 对于内隐自我扩张动机, 可釆用内隐联想测验的变式GO/NO-GO (GNAT) (何玉莹, 2014)。

2.2.2 将他人纳入自我的研究方法

(1)问卷法。最常见的是将他人纳入自我量表(Inclusion of Other in the Self Scale, IOS;Aron, Aron, & Smollan, 1992), 用来评估个体将他人纳入自我的程度。IOS能有效测量亲密程度, 区分亲密关系和普通关系(Agnew, Loving, Le, & Goodfriend, 2004)。该量表由7组圆圈构成, 每组有两个圆圈, 一个代表自己, 一个代表他人, 两个圆圈重叠部分代表两人彼此纳入的程度和亲密程度。IOS可以用于个体(Carpenter & Spottswood, 2013)和跨群体研究(Dys-Steenbergen et al., 2016), 结果表明具有良好的信效度。

(2)实验法。使用最广的是“我/非我反应时”范式(Aron, Aron, Tudor, & Nelson, 1991)。该范式假设当出现某一描述特征的词汇, 如果被试与伴侣在这一特征上存在差异, 则他们对这类词汇的反应更疑惑, 反应速度也更慢。例如, 首先呈现90个描述人格特征的词汇, 这些词汇可能描述自己、伴侣还有非亲密他人, 要求被试对这些词汇进行7级评估, 1~7表示不符合的程度。最后评估取中位数, 大于等于4表示该词和目标对象不相符(F), 小于4表示相符(T)。正式反应实验阶段, 在电脑屏幕上显示几个特征描述词, 被试进行按键反应, A键代表该词描述的是“我”, L键代表该词描述的“非我”, 电脑记录反应时。

3 未来研究的展望

本文从关系建立、维持和破裂及研究方法上梳理当前成果, 以期为国内外开展自我扩张研究提供参考依据。然而(1)当前研究还停留在描述阶段, 具体运作机制有待进一步探究; (2)研究对象主要集中在伴侣关系, 忽略了其他类型的研究; (3)鲜有研究关注成对伴侣的自我扩张以及他们的相互作用; (4)现有研究主要集中在西方国家, 不利于跨文化研究和推广。因此未来研究可以从以下几方面展开。

3.1 亲密关系中自我扩张的机制

第一, 考察自我扩张在亲密关系不同阶段的表现形式、影响因素和作用机制。尽管自我扩张理论在择偶、不忠、关系维持等方面产生了大量成果, 但多数研究采用横断设计, 无法考察自我扩张在不同亲密关系阶段的发展规律, 以及各阶段切换的动态过程。诸如自我扩张要积累到什么程度才能导致吸引、减少到什么水平会引发不忠等问题今后有待探讨。第二, 考察自我扩张在亲密关系与非关系的运作机制。已有文献聚焦于亲密关系, 而忽视了非关系研究。Mattingly和Lewandowski (2013b, 2014)发现自我扩张可以脱离伴侣, 通过非关系中的新颖性和挑战性活动来实现。可见, 个体的自我扩张不能完全由亲密关系解释, 进一步研究自我扩张在非关系中的运作机制, 以及如何从关系扩张转换为非关系扩张对婚姻治疗具有重要意义。例如, 不忠与缺乏关系扩张有关, 若非关系扩张可以弥补关系扩张的不足, 出轨的概率就会大幅降低。第三, 考察自我扩张动机与将他人纳入自我的运作机制。前者属于动机过程, 主观体验是兴奋与渴望, 后者属于认知过程, 主观体验是亲密, 两者不能直接等同。例如, 即便丈夫提供了大量的自我扩张机会, 妻子也可能体验不到亲密感, 或者夫妻间有很高的亲密度, 但却缺乏自我扩张(Aron, Norman, Aron, Mckenna, & Heyman, 2000)。现有研究只考虑自我扩张动机或将他人纳入自我, 局限了我们对自我扩张的全面认识, 未来应在研究中同时纳入两者。第四, 考察自我扩张的消极面。当前研究多数停留在积极视角, 例如提升关系质量, 增强自尊和效能感, 忽略了自我扩张带来的消极影响。首先在扩张对象上, 我们能将伴侣好的和坏的方面纳入自我(有意或无意) (Slotter & Gardner, 2012b)。如果伴侣将我们坏的方面纳入自我中, 是否会影响对方感知到的满意度?我们要如何消除这些不良扩张?其次在扩张结果上, 过多的自我扩张使个体感觉被控制或者身份的丧失(Aron et al., 2004), 参与不合适的扩张活动, 如挑战性过高或过低都有伤个体的自尊和效能感(Knee et al., 2013)。因此, 未来研究有必要探究如何识别自我扩张带来的消极作用以及对应的干预手段。

3.2 亲密关系的不同类型对自我扩张的影响

第一, 考察自我扩张在不同亲密关系的特点。已有研究聚焦于浪漫关系, 鲜有考察亲子关系和朋友关系。例如, 人们发现友谊也是自我扩张的重要源泉(White & Gaines, 2006; Kou & Powpaka, 2017), 就像浪漫关系一样, 开始一段新友谊, 我们会通过将对方新颖的资源、观点和认同纳入自我来实现自我扩张(Wages, 2016)。但与友情相比, 爱情还包含对伴侣的着迷和性欲望。研究发现, 约有1/3的人被浪漫伴侣要求终止友谊, 73%的人默认当前伴侣的要求。当他们的伴侣关系提供高度自我扩张而友谊却不能时, 参与者大多愿意放弃友谊; 但当友谊提供高度自我扩张时, 无论伴侣提供的自我扩张程度如何, 放弃友谊的意愿都会下降(Wages, 2016)。因此有必要将自我扩张放在浪漫关系、亲子关系和朋友关系中进行对比研究, 考察不同关系下自我扩张的特点, 所占比重以及先后顺序。第二, 考察自我扩张在现实亲密关系和网络亲密关系的特点。随着互联网的普及, 网络亲密关系成为一种新现象。与现实亲密关系相比, 它具有以下几个特点: 由网络匿名性带来的高度自我表露; 由网络交流的不同时性带来的积极自我表征; 由网络虚拟性带来的自我满足(孟庆东, 王争艳, 2009)。因此, 自我扩张在网络亲密关系的建立、维持和破裂中扮演何种角色, 以及与现实亲密关系有何差异, 这将是值得深究的问题。

3.3 亲密者自我扩张之间的相互影响

相互依赖理论认为同属一对关系的个体以复杂的方式相互影响(Thibaut & Kelley, 1959), 一方的行为在影响自己的同时也会影响对方。绝大多数研究者忽视了这点, 只测量关系中的一方。少数研究者测量了关系双方(Carson et al., 2007; Fivecoat et al., 2015; Graham, 2008; Graham & Harf, 2015), 但在数据处理上将关联数据当做独立数据来分析, 无法探究伴侣间的相互影响。同时这种做法容易忽略个体差异(Cook & Kenny, 2005), 提高了犯Ⅰ、Ⅱ类错误的概率(Kenny, Kashy, & Cook, 2006)。对于以上问题, 主客体互倚模型(Actor-Partner Interdependence Model, APIM)不失为一种有效方法(Cook & Kenny, 2005; 刘畅, 伍新春, 2017)。该模型的使用有助于推进现有研究, 例如, 关系双方在原有资源、扩张速度和能力上存在个体差异(贾凤翔, 石伟, 2012), 却不知道个体的扩张速度和能力对另一半的扩张是否以及如何产生影响, 诸如此类问题使用APIM可以得到解决。

3.4 不同对象与群体的比较

第一, 丰富研究对象的多样性。目前研究主要基于普通夫妻或大学生展开(Graham & Harf, 2015; Ledbetter et al., 2013; Vanderdrift et al., 2011), 研究样本单一, 缺乏代表性。然而在不幸福的婚姻中, 那些受教育水平低和属于少数民族的个体所占比例要大得多(Glenn, 2005)。随着宗教异端婚姻、种族和族裔成员间通婚数量的迅速增加, 已婚夫妇的多样性在过去10年显著增加, 研究者应加强对低收入、非裔美国人以及军人夫妇等特殊群体的关注(Fincham & Beach, 2010)。第二, 考量文化背景。现有研究聚焦于西方文化背景下的自我扩张, 国内相关文献寥寥无几。西方社会文化有助于形成独立型自我结构, 而东方社会文化则容易形成互倚型自我结构(Lehman, Chiu, & Schaller, 2004)。研究发现, 互倚型自我结构启动时个体的自我扩张动机水平较高; 反之, 独立型自我结构启动时个体的自我扩张动机水平较低(郭积椿, 2011)。换句话说, 西方人的自我扩张动机水平比东方人更低。因此, 未来研究可以考察中国文化要素对自我扩张的影响, 将不同群体或文化背景的对象进行比较研究。

The authors have declared that no competing interests exist.
作者已声明无竞争性利益关系。

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Abstract This article explores the motivational aspects of the self-expansion model, focusing on 2 key themes: (1) the desire to expand the resources, perspectives, and identities available for accomplishing goals and (2) the desire to experience positive affect arising from the process of such expansion. These themes are considered in the context of current social psychological work on motivation (to which the model mainly contributes an understanding of goal selection) as well as in relation to theories and research in the relationship area (the area in which the model was originally developed and in which it has generated most of its research). Considered more briefly are the links of self-expansion motivation with another key aspect of the self-expansion model, including other in the self, and a discussion of 5 potentially significant motivational aspects of the model or issues that have not been much studied to date. (PsycINFO Database Record (c) 2012 APA, all rights reserved)

Aron A., Norman C. C., Aron E. N., Mckenna C., & Heyman R. E . ( 2000).

Couples' shared participation in novel and arousing activities and experienced relationship quality

Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 78( 2), 273-284.

URL     PMID:10707334      [本文引用: 1]

Abstract Using a newspaper questionnaire, a door-to-door survey, and 3 laboratory experiments, the authors examined a proposed effect of shared participation in novel and arousing activities on experienced relationship quality. The questionnaire and survey studies found predicted correlations of reported shared "exciting" activities and relationship satisfaction plus their predicted mediation by relationship boredom. In all 3 experiments, the authors found predicted greater increases in experienced relationship quality from before to after participating together in a 7-min novel and arousing (vs. a more mundane) task. Comparison with a no-activity control showed the effect was due to the novel-arousing task. The same effect was found on ratings of videotaped discussions before and after the experimental task. Finally, all results remained after controlling for relationship social desirability. Results bear on general issues of boredom and excitement in relationships and the role of such processes in understanding the typical early decline of relationship quality after the honeymoon period.

Aron A., Paris M., & Aron E. N . ( 1995).

Falling in love: Prospective studies of self-concept change

Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 69( 6), 1102-1112.

URL     [本文引用: 1]

ABSTRACT Two prospective, longitudinal studies examined the consequences of falling in love, focusing on predictions developed in the context of A. Aron and E. N. Aron's (1986, in press) self-expansion model of motivation and cognition in close relationships. In each study a sample with a high expected incidence of falling in love (first- and second-year undergraduates in the fall term) was tested 5 times over 10 weeks. At each testing participants indicated whether they had fallen in love and either made open-ended lists of self-descriptive terms (Study 1; N68=68329) or completed standard self-efficacy and self-esteem measures (Study 2; N68=68529). As predicted, after falling in love there was greater change and increased diversity of self-concept domains (Study 1) and increased self-efficacy and self-esteem (Study 2). Partial correlation analyses suggested that results in both studies were not due to mood change. (PsycINFO Database Record (c) 2012 APA, all rights reserved)

Aron A. P., Mashek D. J., & Aron E. N . ( 2004).

Closeness as including other in the self

In D. J. Mashek & A. P. Aron (Eds.), Handbook of closeness and intimacy ( pp. 27-41). Mahwah, NJ, US: Lawrence Erlbaum Associates Publishers.

URL     [本文引用: 2]

Aron A., Steele J. L., Kashdan T. B., & Perez M . ( 2006).

When similars do not attract: Tests of a prediction from the self-expansion model

Personal Relationships, 13( 4), 387-396.

URL     [本文引用: 2]

This study tested the hypothesis from the self-expansion model that the usual effect of greater attraction to a similar (vs. dissimilar) stranger will be reduced or reversed when a person is given information that a relationship would be likely to develop (i.e., that they would be very likely to get along) with the other person. The study employed the "bogus stranger" paradigm and focused on similarity/dissimilarity of interests in the context of attraction to a same-gender other. The effect for similarity under conditions in which no information is given about relationship likelihood replicated the usual pattern of greater attraction to similars. However, as predicted, a significant similarity by information interaction demonstrated that this effect was significantly reduced (and slightly reversed) when participants had been given information that the partner will like self. In analyses for each gender separately, both of these effects were significant only for men, suggesting that the focus on interest similarity may have been less relevant for women.

Aron, E.N., &Aron, A . ( 1996).

Love and expansion of the self: The state of the model

Personal Relationships, 3( 1), 45-58.

URL    

The self-expansion model of love developed out of a confluence of research on attraction and arousal, Eastern psychology, motivation theory, and the social psychology of personal relationships. The model treats love (the desire for a relationship with a particular other) as arising from a desire to expand the self by including that other in the self, as well as by associating expansion with that particular other. First, the model is described, including its function as a source of heuristically important metaphors for common human experiences of love and its unique focus in relation to other approaches to love. The remainder of the article examines its application, including supporting research, to predictors of falling in love, motivations for unrequited love, consequences of falling in love, love as including each other in each other's self, and how love changes (and how it can be maintained) in long-term relationships. The conclusion examines current trends in which the model serves as both a very general integration of useful perspectives and as a set of precise mini-theories.

Blood Jr , R. O., & Wolfe, D. M.(1960) . Husbands and wives: The dynamics of married living New York Free Press The dynamics of married living. New York Free Press, 2(4), 1-8.

Boelen, P.A., & Van den Hout, M. A . ( 2010).

Inclusion of other in the self and breakup-related grief following relationship dissolution

Journal of Loss and Trauma, 15( 6), 534-547.

URL    

Self-expansion theory proposes that close others are included in the self as a source of self-expansion. Using data from 78 students confronted with relationship breakup, this study examined inclusion of the former partner in the self and its role in breakup-related grief. Inclusion of other in the self (IOS) was assessed using the IOS Scale and a reaction-time task in which participants made “me/not me” decisions for traits that were the same or different for self and ex-partner. The reaction-time task replicated earlier findings that close relationships result in confusion between traits of self and other. Furthermore, findings showed that direct/explicit IOS (tapped with the IOS Scale) but not indirect/implicit IOS (tapped with the reaction-time task) was associated with breakup-related grief.

Burris C. T., Rempel J. K., Munteanu A. R., & Therrien P. A . ( 2013).

More, more, more: The dark side of self- expansion motivation

Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, 39( 5), 578-595.

URL     PMID:23504598      [本文引用: 1]

Abstract Self-expansion without regard for others' well-being may represent the dark side of an otherwise healthy motive. Guided by Amoebic Self-Theory (AST), we developed the Engulfing Self Scale (ESS) to measure acquisitive tendencies across AST's three domains of the self. Four studies revealed that bodily engulfment appeared generally benign, and that the problematic aspects of social engulfment were generally restricted to interpersonal contexts. Spatial-symbolic engulfment motivation was linked to a breadth of problematic indices such as psychopathy, Machiavellianism, narcissism, psychological entitlement, social dominance orientation, economic system justification, greed, and valuation of power. It also predicted reluctance to expose a cheating group leader when doing so would threaten one's own positive outcomes, greater justification of a looter's behavior when prompted take his or her perspective, and greater justification of self-serving reward allocations after defeating an ostensible competitor. Spatial-symbolic engulfment may be a motivational fountainhead for behaviors that negate others' well-being.

Buss, D.M. ( 1985).

Human mate selection: Opposites are sometimes said to attract, but in fact we are likely to marry someone who is similar to us in almost every variable

American Scientist, 73( 1), 47-51.

URL     [本文引用: 1]

Scitation is the online home of leading journals and conference proceedings from AIP Publishing and AIP Member Societies

Carpenter, C.J., &Spottswood, E.L . ( 2013).

Exploring romantic relationships on social networking sites using the self-expansion model

Computers in Human Behavior, 29( 4), 1531-1537.

URL     [本文引用: 1]

Several hypotheses were derived from the self-expansion model (Aron & Aron, 1986) concerning romantic relationships and social networking sites (SNSs). A sample of 276 participants responded to questions about their relationship history and SNS uses and a subset of those (N=149) responded to additional questions about a current romantic partner. Results suggest that past self-expansion leaves a residue shown by more interests. This finding was moderated by overall Facebook use. Particular Facebook behaviors such as tagging one partner in status updates, appearing together in photographs, and listing similar interests on profiles are indicative of self-expansion processes typically found in romantic relationships.

Carson J. W., Carson K. M., Gil K. M., & Baucom D. H . ( 2007).

Self-expansion as a mediator of relationship improvements in a mindfulness intervention

Journal of Marital and Family Therapy, 33( 4), 517-528.

URL     PMID:17935533      [本文引用: 2]

In a recent randomized controlled trial, couples participating in a mindfulness-based relationship enhancement program demonstrated significant improvements in relationship satisfaction and relationship distress ( Carson, Carson, Gil, & Baucom, 2004 ). Here we report on a multiple mediation analysis of these couples' improvements. Potential mediators included measures of couples' engagement in exciting self-expanding activities, couples' ability to accept one another's difficult characteristics, and individual partners' ability to relax. Results indicate that to a large extent, the mindfulness-related relationship improvements can be attributed to partners' sense that they were participating in exciting self-expanding activities together during the course of the intervention. The implications of these findings for future mindfulness research are discussed.

Clore, G.L., &Byrne, D . ( 1974).

A reinforcement-affect model of attraction

Foundations of Interpersonal Attraction, 143-170.

[本文引用: 1]

Dimotakis N., Scott B. A., & Koopman J . ( 2011).

An experience sampling investigation of workplace interactions, affective states, and employee well-being

Journal of Organizational Behavior, 32( 4), 572-588.

URL     [本文引用: 1]

We report an experience sampling study examining the within-individual effects of workplace interpersonal interaction characteristics on affect at work and daily well-being. A sample of 60 full-time employees completed measures of interpersonal interaction characteristics and affective states during each of 10 workdays and a measure of job satisfaction at the end of each workday. Overall, the employees provided 380 day-level data points. Hierarchical linear modeling (HLM) results indicated that interpersonal interaction characteristics were associated with affective states and job satisfaction. Furthermore, the effects of workplace interpersonal interactions on job satisfaction were mediated by affective states. Finally, positive affect mitigated the detrimental association between negative affect and job satisfaction. Copyright 2010 John Wiley & Sons, Ltd.

Dys-Steenbergen O., Wright S. C., & Aron A . ( 2016).

Self-expansion motivation improves cross-group interactions and enhances self-growth

Group Processes and Intergroup Relations, 19( 1), 60-71.

URL     [本文引用: 3]

Abstract Rather than seeing outgroup members as targets of fear, conflict, or even tolerance, the self-expansion model proposes that outgroup members might be seen as attractive opportunities for self-growth. The current study utilizes an experimental manipulation to raise (or lower) self-expansion motivation prior to a positive interaction with a stranger from a different ethnic group. The results show that priming high self-expansion motivation leads to higher quality interactions, greater interpersonal closeness, greater feelings of self-growth, and higher feelings of self-efficacy. In addition, these outcomes show patterns of mediation consistent with the predictions of self-expansion theory. These findings point to a potentially valuable tool for improving the quality of cross-group contact experiences. More broadly, they focus attention on the genuinely positive functions that relationships with outgroup members can have for the self.

Figueredo A. J., Sefcek J. A., & Jones D. N . ( 2006).

The ideal romantic partner personality

Personality and Individual Differences, 41( 3), 431-441.

Fincham, F.D., &Beach, S. R.H . ( 2010).

Marriage in the new millennium: A decade in review

Journal of Marriage and Family, 72( 3), 630-649.

URL     [本文引用: 1]

This review focuses on broad themes characterizing marital research in the past decade. In addition to continuing themes, such as a focus on conflict, violence, and impact on physical and mental health outcomes, we also address the impact of the Healthy Marriage Initiative on marital research and recent advances in methodology. We highlight an overarching theme that characterizes much of the literature: the importance of context in understanding marital outcomes and the impact of positive marital transactions and marital strengths. Given the increasing diversity of married couples, the attention given to context over the past decade has been timely and appropriate, providing an increasingly solid foundation for future research.

Fivecoat H. C., Tomlinson J. M., Aron A., & Caprariello P. A . ( 2015).

Partner support for individual self-expansion opportunities: effects on relationship satisfaction in long-term couples

Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, 32( 3), 368-385.

[本文引用: 3]

Gaunt, R . ( 2006).

Couple similarity and marital satisfaction: Are similar spouses happier?

Journal of Personality, 74( 5), 1401-1420.

URL     PMID:16958707      [本文引用: 1]

ABSTRACT This study examined the role of couple similarity in spouses' marital satisfaction and affect. The associations between spousal similarity and relationship measures were examined in a sample of 248 married couples. As hypothesized, greater similarity between partners was associated with higher levels of marital satisfaction and lower levels of negative affect. In particular, similarity on the gendered personality and values domains was more strongly associated with relationship measures, whereas similarity on the attitudes and religiosity domains showed weaker and inconsistent patterns of associations. Finally, profile-based similarity tended to be a stronger and more consistent correlate of relationship measures than difference score-based similarity. The implications of these findings for processes underlying intimate relationships are discussed.

Glenn, N.D. ( 2005).

With this ring: A national survey on marriage in America

. Washington, DC: National Fatherhood Initiative. Retrieved from .

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Gordon, C.L., &Baucom, D.H . ( 2009).

Examining the individual within marriage: Personal strengths and relationship satisfaction

Personal Relationships, 16( 3), 421-435.

URL    

The present investigation aims to identify individual strengths that may benefit efforts toward marital enhancement. Ninety-two married couples from the Southeastern United States completed questionnaires measuring positive affectivity, optimism, coping skills, personal expansion, and marital satisfaction. Results indicate that perceptions of a spouse's positive affectivity, as well as one's own positive affectivity, are related to relationship satisfaction. In addition, positive affectivity contributed to satisfaction above and beyond negative affectivity. Finally, optimism, coping skills, and personal expansion appear to be important resources for marriage via their association with each partner's affectivity. The discussion considers these results in the context of marital enhancement and relationship flourishing.

Gordon, C.L., &Luo, S.H . ( 2011).

The personal expansion questionnaire: measuring one’s tendency to expand through novelty and augmentation

Personality and Individual Differences, 51( 2), 89-94.

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Previous research indicates that self-expansion, or acquiring a partner’s resources by “including the other in the self”, benefits satisfaction in romantic relationships (Aron, Mashek, & Aron, 2004). The present investigation seeks to broaden traditional conceptualizations of self-expansion by integrating it with principles of social penetration theory (Taylor, 1968) and considering expansion not only as a dyadic process, but also an individual personality trait. We have termed the newly conceptualized construct “personal expansion”. Three separate studies (=02172 married adults, 606 undergraduate students, and 129 additional undergraduates, respectively) are presented to validate the Personal Expansion Questionnaire; a 10-item self-report scale developed to measure this newly defined construct. Results indicate a two factor structure underlying personal expansion. Both convergent and discriminant validity are established in comparison to one’s individual needs, affective traits, and the Big Five personality factors. Finally, test–retest reliability for the PEQ is demonstrated across five weeks. Consideration is given to the unique ways that personal expansion may be particularly relevant to long-term relationship success at both the individual and dyadic level.

Graham, J.M. ( 2008).

Self-expansion and flow in couples' momentary experiences: An experience sampling study

Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 95( 3), 679-694.

URL     PMID:18729702      [本文引用: 3]

Abstract The self-expansion model of close relationships posits that when couples engage in exciting and activating conjoint activities, they feel connected with their partners and more satisfied with their relationships. In the present study, the experience sampling method was used to examine the predictions of the self-expansion model in couples' momentary experiences. In addition, the author generated several new hypotheses by integrating the self-expansion model with existing research on flow. Over the course of 1 week, 20 couples were signaled at quasi-random intervals to provide data on 1,265 unique experiences. The results suggest that the level of activation experienced during an activity was positively related to experience-level relationship quality. This relationship was consistent across free-time and nonfree-time contexts and was mediated by positive affect. Activation was not found to predict later affect unless the level of activation exceeded what was typical for the individual. Also examined was the influence of interpersonal context and activity type on self-expansion. The results support the self-expansion model and suggest that it could be considered under the broader umbrella of flow.

Graham, J.M., &Harf, M.R . ( 2015).

Self-expansion and flow: the roles of challenge, skill, affect, and activation

Personal Relationships, 22( 1), 45-64.

URL     [本文引用: 4]

The self‐expansion model posits that engaging in challenging activities with one's romantic partner increases the quality of that romantic relationship. Research on flow suggests that the optimal level of challenge for such experiences is determined by the skill of the individual. In a series of 5 studies spanning experimental, survey, and experience sampling methodologies, we elaborate on the self‐expansion model to describe how activity challenge effects romantic relationship quality. The results suggest that engaging in challenging activities with one's partner results in increases in relationship quality, though this effect is dependent on the skill of the individual. Changes in affect appear to fully mediate this process. We present a theoretical model combining self‐expansion and flow theories.

Harasymchuk, C., &Fehr, B . ( 2010).

A script analysis of relational boredom: Causes, feelings, and coping strategies

Journal of Social and Clinical Psychology, 29( 9), 988-1019.

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Hazan, C., &Shaver, P . ( 1987).

Romantic love conceptualized as an attachment process

Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 52( 3), 511-524.

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James, W. ( 1948).

Psychology

Cleveland, OH: Fine Editions Press. (Original work published 1890).

Kenny D. A., Kashy D. A. , & Cook, W. L.(2006) .

Methodology in the social sciences (David A. Kenny, Series Editor). Dyadic data analysis

New York, NY, US: Guilford Press.

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Kirkpatrick, L.A., &Hazan, C . ( 1994).

Attachment styles and close relationships: A four-year prospective study

Personal Relationships, 1( 2), 123-142.

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Knee C. R., Hadden B. W., Porter B., & Rodriguez L. M . ( 2013).

Self-determination theory and romantic relationship processes

Personality and Social Psychology Review, 17( 4), 307-324.

URL     PMID:23921674      [本文引用: 1]

Abstract Self-determination theory can be viewed as a theory of optimal relationship development and functioning. We examine the concept of self that is employed in self-determination theory and explain how its unique definition allows an important and novel characterization of investing one's "self" in romantic relationships. A self-determined perspective on romantic relationships integrates several theories on romantic relationship development, but also goes beyond them by explicitly articulating the personality, developmental, and situational factors that facilitate optimal self-investment and relational functioning. Self-determination promotes openness rather than defensiveness and facilitates perspective-taking, authenticity, and support of close others. The dyadic context of romantic relationships affords great opportunity for theoretical development and integration of self-determination theory with current theories of interdependence and relational well-being.

Kou, Y., &Powpaka, S . ( 2017).

Why friends pay more: An alternative explanation based on self-expansion motives

Social Behavior and Personality: An International Journal, 45( 9), 1537-1552.

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Friendships developed prior to engagement in business transactions play an important role in...

Kozieł, S., &Pawłowski, B . ( 2003).

Comparison between primary and secondary mate markets: An analysis of data from lonely hearts columns

Personality and Individual Differences, 35( 8), 1849-1857.

URL     [本文引用: 3]

Personal advertisements placed in newspapers can be a good source of information on the dynamics of the human mate market. From an analysis of 1587 (776 female and 811 male) advertisements placed in the local Lower Silesian (Poland) newspaper, we were able to compare primary (never married) (PMM) and secondary (divorced/separated) (SMM) mate markets. When controlling for place of residence, it was revealed that the mean time span between the end of education and the age at which females resort to personal advertisement (7 8 years) is very similar in the three education categories. Men who graduated from high school or university were over-represented on the SMM. There were no differences in the residuals of height, weight or BMI between PMM and SMM for females and significant difference only for men's height with relatively taller men on the SMM for the combined two lower levels of education. We also compared PMM and SMM separately for men and women in terms of the rates of offering and seeking resources, attractiveness, commitment and social skills. PMM and SMM differ in three such categories for men and in four for women. However when controlling for advertiser's age, there were only two differences for women (resources were sought for and attractiveness offered more often on the SMM) and one for men (commitment was sought more frequently on the SMM). This indicates that the difference in preferences should be attributed mainly to the age of subjects and only to a smaller extent to the type of mate market (PMM vs SMM).

Leary, M.R. ( 2007).

Motivational and emotional aspects of the self

Annual Review of Psychology, 58( 1), 317-344.

URL     PMID:16953794      [本文引用: 4]

Abstract Recent theory and research are reviewed regarding self-related motives (self-enhancement, self-verification, and self-expansion) and self-conscious emotions (guilt, shame, pride, social anxiety, and embarrassment), with an emphasis on how these motivational and emotional aspects of the self might be related. Specifically, these motives and emotions appear to function to protect people's social well-being. The motives to self-enhance, self-verify, and self-expand are partly rooted in people's concerns with social approval and acceptance, and self-conscious emotions arise in response to events that have real or imagined implications for others' judgments of the individual. Thus, these motives and emotions do not operate to maintain certain states of the self, as some have suggested, but rather to facilitate people's social interactions and relationships.

Ledbetter A. M., Stassen-Ferrara H. M., & Dowd M. M . ( 2013).

Comparing equity and self-expansion theory approaches to relational maintenance

Personal Relationships, 20( 1), 38-51.

URL    

Focusing on relational maintenance in heterosexual romantic dyads, this investigation compares the equity theory approach with self-expansion theory, an alternative approach predicting maintenance behavior when a partner includes the other in the sense of the self. Results supported both theoretical explanations, albeit support for self-expansion theory was more consistent, predicting all maintenance behavior types. Although relational maintenance constructs were statistically comparable between men and women, a sex difference emerged regarding maintenance behavior's predictors, with self-expansion theory a stronger explanation for men but not women. The discussion considers how these results inform the distinction between exchange- and communally oriented conceptualizations of relationships, as well as development of a communicative theory of relational maintenance.

Ledbetter A. M., Stassen H., Muhammad A., & Kotey E. N . ( 2010).

Relational maintenance as including the other in the self

Qualitative Research Reports in Communication, 11( 1), 21-28.

URL     [本文引用: 1]

This manuscript advances “inclusion of the other in the self” as an alternative theoretical framework for understanding relational maintenance behavior. Using a qualitative data analytic strategy akin to early equity-theoretic relational maintenance research, this manuscript proposes a typology that conceptualizes maintenance behaviors as facilitating shared resources, identities, and perspectives. This approach complements both the equity theory perspective and related lines of interpersonal communication research.

Lehman D. R., Chiu C. Y., & Schaller M . ( 2004).

Psychology and culture

Annual Review of Psychology, 55, 689-714.

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Lewandowski, Jr, G.W., &Ackerman, R.A . ( 2006).

Something's missing: Need fulfillment and self-expansion as predictors of susceptibility to infidelity

The Journal of Social Psychology, 146( 4), 389-403.

URL     PMID:16894700     

The present authors investigated whether an individual's motivations that are related to need fulfillment and self-expansion within a romantic relationship can predict self-reported susceptibility to infidelity. A sample of 109 college students (50 men, 59 women) who were in dating relationships completed questionnaires that assessed 5 types of variables of need fulfillment (i.e., intimacy, companionship, sex, security, and emotional involvement), 3 types of self-expansion variables (i.e., self-expansion, inclusion of the other in the self, and potential for self-expansion), and susceptibility to infidelity. As the present authors predicted, both sets of predictors (need fulfillment and self-expansion) significantly contributed to the variance in susceptibility to infidelity. The present findings indicated the possibility that, when a relationship is not able to fulfill needs or provide ample self-expansion for an individual, his or her susceptibility to infidelity increases.

Lewandowski Jr, G.W., &Aron, A . ( 2002, February).

The self-expansion scale: Construction and validation

Paper presented at the meeting of in third annual meeting of the Society of Personality and Social Psychology, Savannah, GA.

Lewandowski, Jr G. W., Aron A., Bassis S., & Kunak J . ( 2006).

Losing a self-expanding relationship: Implications for the self-concept

Personal Relationships, 13( 3), 317-331.

Lin W. F., Lin Y. C., Huang C. L., & Chen L. H . ( 2016).

We can make it better: “we” moderates the relationship between a compromising style in interpersonal conflict and well-being

Journal of Happiness Studies, 17( 1), 41-57.

URL     [本文引用: 1]

Compromising is considered a useful strategy for solving interpersonal conflicts. However, compromising, which includes accommodating and sacrificing, may also lead to anxiety and depression. Therefore, the current study focused on a moderating mechanism between compromising and psychological health. Based on self-expansion theory, we hypothesized that the more individuals have a relational focus (i.e., a greater use of “we”) while narrating their compromising experiences, the better psychological health they will experience. Two hundred sixty-one participants from National Taiwan University (mean age02=0220.40, 53.2602% male, 46.7402% female), wrote about an experience of conflict with their parents and completed a package of questionnaires to measure their conflict management style and psychological health. The frequency of the “we” pronoun was considered an index of relational focus. As predicted, the results from a hierarchical multiple regression demonstrated that “we” moderated the effect of compromising style on well-being. Specifically, the relationship between compromising and psychological well-being were strengthened for individuals who had more relational focus. Thus, although a compromising style helps solve interpersonal conflicts, it does not necessarily increase individuals’ well-being. How individuals anchor their experiences are more important.

Lord, C.G. ( 1980).

Schemas and images as memory aids: Two modes of processing social information

Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 38( 2), 257-269.

URL    

Abstract Proposes that schemas, informational structures characterized as verbal or propositional, are more effective as memory aids for information about the self than for information about other people. It is also proposed that images, informational structures characterized as visual or imaginal, are more effective as memory aids for information about other people than for information about the self. Two parallel experiments were performed. In Exp I, 24 undergraduates who were asked to decide whether various trait adjectives described either themselves or other people showed superior subsequent recall for the self-referent words. In Exp II, 24 undergraduates asked to form mental images of either themselves or other people interacting with various concrete objects showed inferior subsequent recall for the self-referent words. These divergent results and several current findings suggest that schemas and images may involve different cognitive principles and constitute 2 modes of processing social information. (38 ref) (PsycINFO Database Record (c) 2012 APA, all rights reserved)

Mattingly, B.A., & Lewandowski Jr, G. W . ( 2013 a).

An expanded self is a more capable self: The association between self-concept size and self-efficacy

Self and Identity, 12( 6), 621-634.

URL     [本文引用: 2]

The self-expansion model states that an expanded self-concept is associated with an increased sense of self-efficacy. We conducted four studies (three correlational, one experimental) to test this central tenet of the self-expansion model in a non-relational context. Results indicate that self-concept size (Studies 1 and 2) and subjective sense of self-concept (Study 3) were positively associated with greater self-efficacy. In Study 4, individuals who were randomly assigned to physically expand a representation of their self-concept reported greater self-efficacy at resolving potential problems than those who contracted a self-representation or left it unchanged. Taken together, these four studies provide the first empirical evidence that expanded self-concepts lead to greater self-efficacy.

Mattingly, B.A., &Lewandowski,Jr, G.W . ( 2013).

The power of one: Benefits of individual self-expansion

The Journal of Positive Psychology, 8( 1), 12-22.

URL    

The self-expansion model suggests that the acquisition of new identities, capabilities, perspectives, and resources primarily occurs in the context of romantic relationships and that self-expanding activities have numerous benefits for relationships. However, self-expansion can theoretically occur outside of a relational context, yet little is known about the benefits of self-expanding activities for individuals. Across six experimental studies, we examined: (1) whether nonrelational novel, exciting, and interesting activities produce self-expansion and (2) whether engaging in nonrelational self-expanding activities results in greater exerted effort. In Studies 1 and 2, individuals who engaged in novel, exciting, and interesting activities experienced greater self-expansion than those who engaged in control activities. In Studies 3 6, individuals who engaged in high self-expanding activities exerted more effort on cognitive and physical tasks than those who engaged in low self-expanding activities, and this effect was not due to depleted self-regulatory resources, altered mood, or changes in self-esteem (Studies 5 and 6).

Mattingly, B.A., &Lewandowski, Jr,G.W . ( 2013 b).

The power of one: Benefits of individual self-expansion

The Journal of Positive Psychology, 8( 1), 12-22.

URL     [本文引用: 4]

The self-expansion model suggests that the acquisition of new identities, capabilities, perspectives, and resources primarily occurs in the context of romantic relationships and that self-expanding activities have numerous benefits for relationships. However, self-expansion can theoretically occur outside of a relational context, yet little is known about the benefits of self-expanding activities for individuals. Across six experimental studies, we examined: (1) whether nonrelational novel, exciting, and interesting activities produce self-expansion and (2) whether engaging in nonrelational self-expanding activities results in greater exerted effort. In Studies 1 and 2, individuals who engaged in novel, exciting, and interesting activities experienced greater self-expansion than those who engaged in control activities. In Studies 3 6, individuals who engaged in high self-expanding activities exerted more effort on cognitive and physical tasks than those who engaged in low self-expanding activities, and this effect was not due to depleted self-regulatory resources, altered mood, or changes in self-esteem (Studies 5 and 6).

Mattingly, B.A., & Lewandowski Jr, G.W . ( 2014).

Expanding the self brick by brick: Nonrelational self-expansion and self-concept size

Social Psychological and Personality Science, 5(4), 484-490.

Mattingly B. A., Mcintyre K. P ., & Lewandowski, Jr, G. W. ( 2012).

Approach motivation and the expansion of self in close relationships

Personal Relationships, 19( 1), 113-127.

URL     [本文引用: 1]

The self-expansion model posits that individuals are fundamentally motivated to expand their sense of self. It is proposed that approach—but not avoidance—motivation underlies self-expansion and that approach-motivated individuals should be especially interested in self-expanding with a person who provides many novel resources, identities, and perspectives. In Studies 1, 2a, and 2b, correlational evidence that self-expansion is associated with both relationship-specific and global measures of approach motivation, but is unrelated to avoidance motivation, was found. In Study 3, experimental evidence that approach motivation increases sensitivity to self-expansion opportunities, such that individuals high in approach motivation are especially attracted to targets who offer many expansion opportunities and unattracted to targets who offer few expansion opportunities was found. Taken together, these studies provide evidence that self-expansion is rooted in approach motivation.

Mashek D., Cannaday L. W., & Tangney J. P . ( 2007).

Inclusion of community in self scale: A single-item pictorial measure of community connectedness

Journal of Community Psychology, 35( 2), 257-275.

URL     [本文引用: 1]

We developed a single-item pictorial measure of community connectedness, building on the theoretical and methodological traditions of the selfexpansion model (Aron & Aron, 1986). The Inclusion of Community in the Self (ICS) Scale demonstrated excellent test01±retest reliability, convergent validity, and discriminant validity in a sample of 190 college students. Importantly, results indicate that the ICS differentially assesses connectedness to the community, distinct from close relationship connectedness, suggesting that the ICS is both conceptually and empirically distinct from Aron, Aron & Smollan's (1992) Inclusion of Other in Self Scale. A secondary analysis of data from 297 incarcerated offenders offered favorable evidence for the generalizability of the measure. Together, results from two independent studies indicate that the ICS offers a simple, yet meaningful, measure of community connectedness. 0008 2007 Wiley Periodicals, Inc.

Mashek D. J., Aron A., & Boncimino M . ( 2003).

Confusions of self with close others

Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, 29( 3), 382-392.

URL     PMID:15273015      [本文引用: 1]

This article explores the cognitive underpinnings of interpersonal closeness in the theoretical context of "including other in the self" and, specifically, the notion of overlap between cognitive representations of self and close others. In each of three studies, participants first rated different traits for self, close others (e.g., romantic partner, best friend), and less close others (e.g., media personalities), followed by a surprise source recognition task (who was each trait rated for?). As predicted, in each study, there were more source confusions between traits rated for self and close others (e.g., a trait rated for self recalled as having been rated for the close other) than between self (or close others) and non-close others. Furthermore, several results suggest that the greater confusions between self and close others are due specifically to interpersonal closeness and not to greater familiarity or similarity with close others

Murray S. L., Holmes J. G., & Griffin D. W . ( 1996).

The benefits of positive illusions: Idealization and the construction of satisfaction in close relationships

Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 70( 1), 79-98.

URL    

It is proposed that satisfaction is associated with idealistic, rather than realistic, perceptions of one's partner. To provide baselines for assessing relationship illusions, both members of married and dating heterosexual couples were asked to rate themselves and their partners on a variety of interpersonal attributes. Participants also rated the typical and ideal partner on these attributes. Path analyses revealed that individuals' impressions of their partners were more a mirror of their self-images and ideals than a reflection of their partners' self-reported attributes. Overall, intimates saw their partners in a more positive light than their partners saw themselves. Furthermore, these idealized constructions predicted greater satisfaction. Individuals were happier in their relationships when they idealized their partners and their partners idealized them. Taken together, these results suggest that a certain degree of idealization or illusion may be a critical feature of satisfying dating and even marital relationships.

Newcomb, T.M. ( 1961).

The acquaintance process. New York: Holt, Rinehart and

Winston.

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Perlman, D. ( 2007).

The best of times, the worst of times: The place of close relationships in psychology and our daily lives

Canadian Psychology, 48( 1), 7-18.

URL    

This article examines the place of relationships in our daily lives and in the field of psychology. The first section of the article offers reasons why relationships are central for humans. Next, the place of relationships in the history, institutional aspects, and subfields of psychology is presented. Then a paradox about relationships is presented: They are both among the most positive, uplifting of life's experiences and yet they can also be among life's darkest aspects. Despite the negative aspects of relationships, most people are very happy in their intimate relations. The paper ends with possible explanations for why satisfaction may be so high.

Reissman C., Aron A., & Bergen M. R . ( 1993).

Shared activities and marital satisfaction: Causal direction and self-expansion versus boredom

Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, 10( 2), 243-254.

URL     [本文引用: 1]

ABSTRACT Fifty-three married couples were randomly assigned to engage in activities for 1.5 hours each week for 10 weeks that were self-defined as (a) exciting or (b) pleasant, or couples were in a (c) no-special-activity control group. Pretest and post-test data were obtained on a standard marital satisfaction measure (adjusted for scores on a social desirability index). A planned linear contrast comparing the two activities groups to the control group was not significant and had a small effect size; thus the theory that any kind of activity enhances marital satisfaction was not supported as an explanation for the well-established association of time together and satisfaction. However, the other planned orthogonal contrast found significantly higher satisfaction for the exciting than the pleasant group, a difference that had a moderate effect size. This finding is consistent with views emphasizing habituation as an obstacle to relationship maintenance - for example, Aron & Aron's (1986) prediction from their self-expansion model that sharing stimulating activities will enhance marital satisfaction.

Rollins, B.C., &Feldman, H . ( 1970).

Marital satisfaction over the family life cycle

Journal of Marriage and the Family, 20-28.

Rusbult C. E., Arriaga X. B., & Agnew C. R . ( 2001).

Interdependence in close relationships

In G. J. O. Fletcher, & M. S. Clark (Eds.), Blackwell handbook of social psychology: Interpersonal processes( pp. 359-387). Malden, MA: Blackwell.

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Rusbult C. E., Drigotas S. M. , & Verette, J.(1994) .

The investment model: An interdependence analysis of commitment processes and relationship maintenance phenomena In D J Canary & L Stafford (Eds), Communication and relational maintenance

(pp. 115-139) San Diego, CA, US: Academic Press.

URL    

Abstract employed interdependence theory constructs and propositions to the goal of understanding how and why some relationships persist and thrive whereas other promising relationships wither and die / interdependence theory distinguishes between satisfaction with a relationship and dependence on a relationship / the investment model adopts this distinction, arguing that the state of dependence is subjectively represented as commitment to a relationship / summarized evidence in support of the claim that stronger commitment is promoted by higher satisfaction level, greater investment size, and lower perceived quality of alternatives (PsycINFO Database Record (c) 2012 APA, all rights reserved)

Sheets, V.L. ( 2014).

Passion for life: Self-expansion and passionate love across the life span

Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, 31( 7), 958-974.

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Slotter, E.B., &Gardner, W.L . ( 2012 a).

How needing you changes me: The influence of attachment anxiety on self-concept malleability in romantic relationships

Self and Identity, 11( 3), 386-408.

URL     [本文引用: 1]

Individuals' selves are malleable in romantic relationships. Specifically, individuals integrate characteristics of partners into their self-concepts to further closeness/intimacy goals (Aron, 2003). Unfortunately, this malleability during relationships predicts self-concept change/confusion if a relationship ends (Slotter, Gardner, & Finkel, 2010). The current research investigated one potential moderator of these effects: attachment anxiety. Individuals who experience elevated attachment anxiety desire greater closeness/intimacy in their relationships than their less anxious counterparts. Thus, their self-concepts may be especially malleable in romantic relationships. Testing these hypotheses, three studies using undergraduate samples demonstrated that elevated attachment anxiety predicted individuals' selves being more malleable during romantic relationships (Studies 1 & 2) and being more susceptible to change/confusion should the relationship end (Studies 3A & 3B).

Slotter, E.B., &Gardner, W.L . ( 2012 b).

The dangers of dating the “bad boy” (or girl): When does romantic desire encourage us to take on the negative qualities of potential partners?

Journal of Experimental Social Psychology, 48( 5), 1173-1178.

URL     [本文引用: 1]

78 Romantic desire motivated individuals to adopt negative traits of a target. 78 This occurred only when the target was presented as a potential romantic partner. 78 This occurred on both explicit and implicit tasks. 78 Desire to meet the target magnified negative attribute adoption. 78 If the attribute was extremely negative or not a stable part of the potential partner's self, individuals did not adopt it.

Smith, C.A., &Stillman, S . ( 2002).

What do women want? The effects of gender and sexual orientation on the desirability of physical attributes in the personal ads of women

Sex Roles, 46( 9-10), 337-342.

URL     [本文引用: 1]

Examining the content of personal ads is one way to determine what individuals desire in partners and what they believe others desire. In the current study we examined heterosexual women, lesbians, and bisexual women seeking female partners. We predicted that gender as well as sexual orientation would impact the number of physical attributes requested and offered. Personal ads were collected from alternative newspapers and one internet site. A total of 357 ads by lesbians, 135 by bisexual women seeking women, and 334 ads by heterosexual women were examined for physical descriptors, including weight. Bisexual women offered the most physical descriptors and lesbians the least. Bisexual women also requested more physical attributes and offered more weight descriptors than did lesbians and heterosexual women. Results suggest that what women want and offer differ by partner choice and sexual orientation.

Stafford, L., &Canary, D.J . ( 1991).

Maintenance strategies and romantic relationship type, gender and relational characteristics

Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, 8( 2), 217-242.

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Stafford, L., &Canary, D.J . ( 2006).

Equity and interdependence as predictors of relational maintenance strategies

The Journal of Family Communication, 6( 4), 227-254.

URL     [本文引用: 1]

This article continues a research program on relational maintenance strategies used in marriage. In particular, we explore how equity and satisfaction, defined in terms of interdependence theory, individually and jointly are predictive of self-reported maintenance strategies. The rationale for the study is based on previous programmatic efforts, as well as a critique of these efforts. Over 200 married couples completed measures of equity, satisfaction, and self-reported maintenance strategies of positivity, openness, assurances, social networks, and sharing tasks. Findings reveal that satisfaction tends to be highest for spouses who perceive their relationships to be equitable, followed by overbenefited partners, followed by underbenefited partners (a curvilinear association, predicted by equity theory). Moreover, wife-defined equity predicted both wife and husband maintenance behaviors in the same inverted curvilinear pattern. The predicted curvilinear trend held only for women-defined equity groups, not men's, in this sample, aside from the use of tasks, which did follow the predicted curvilinear patterns. Also, support for an equity framework was found, as underbenefited husbands reported significantly lower levels of 3 of the 5 maintenance behaviors than did equitable or overbenefited husbands. Finally, using women's reports, the combination of equity and satisfaction was a more powerful predictor of maintenance behavior than either of these constructs alone.

Sternberg, R.J. ( 1986).

A triangular theory of love

Psychological Review, 93( 2), 119-135.

URL    

Abstract Presents a triangular theory of love, which deals both with the nature of love and with loves in different kinds of relationships. It is suggested that there are 3 components: (a) intimacy encompassing the feelings of closeness, connectedness, and bondedness experienced in loving relationships; (b) passion encompassing the drives that lead to romance, physical attraction, and sexual consummation; and (c) decision/commitment encompassing, in the short term, the decision that one loves another, and in the long term, the commitment to maintain that love. The amount of love one experiences depends on the absolute strength of the 3 components, and the kind of love one experiences depends on their strengths relative to each other. The components interact with each other and with the actions that they produce and that produce them so as to form a number of different kinds of loving experiences. The triangular theory of love subsumes other theories and can account for a number of empirical findings in the research literature, as well as for a number of experiences with which many are familiar firsthand. It is proposed that the triangular theory provides a comprehensive basis for understanding many aspects of the love that underlies close relationships. (53 ref) (PsycINFO Database Record (c) 2012 APA, all rights reserved)

Strassberg, D.S., &Holty, S . ( 2003).

An experimental study of women's Internet personal ads

Archives of Sexual Behavior, 32( 3), 253-260.

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Symons, C.S., &Johnson, B.T . ( 1997).

The self-reference effect in memory: A meta-analysis

Psychological Bulletin, 121( 3), 371-394.

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Thibaut, J.W., &Kelley, H.H . ( 1959).

Power and dependence

The Social Psychology of Groups, 7, 100-125.

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Tomlinson, J.M., &Aron, A . ( 2013).

The path to closeness: A mediational model for overcoming the risks of increasing closeness

Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, 30( 6), 805-812.

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Trivers, R. ( 1972).

Parental investment and sexual selection

(Vol. 136 , p. 179). Cambridge, MA: Biological Laboratories, Harvard University.

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Turner R. N., Hewstone M., Voci A., & Vonofakou C . ( 2008).

A test of the extended intergroup contact hypothesis: The mediating role of intergroup anxiety, perceived ingroup and outgroup norms, and inclusion of the outgroup in the self

Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 95( 4), 843-860.

URL     PMID:18808263      [本文引用: 1]

Abstract S. C. Wright, A. Aron, T. McLaughlin-Volpe, and S. A. Ropp (1997) proposed that the benefits associated with cross-group friendship might also stem from vicarious experiences of friendship. Extended contact was proposed to reduce prejudice by reducing intergroup anxiety, by generating perceptions of positive ingroup and outgroup norms regarding the other group, and through inclusion of the outgroup in the self. This article documents the first test of Wright et al.'s model, which used structural equation modeling among two independent samples in the context of South Asian-White relations in the United Kingdom. Supporting the model, all four variables mediated the relationship between extended contact and outgroup attitude, controlling for the effect of direct contact. A number of alternative models were ruled out, indicating that the four mediators operate concurrently rather than predicting one another.

Vanderdrift L. E., Lewandowski, Jr G. W., & Agnew C. R . ( 2011).

Reduced self-expansion in current romance and interest in relationship alternatives

Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, 28( 3), 356-373.

Wages, E.C. ( 2016).

Self-Expansion and Romantic Partner Request for Friendship Termination

Scripps Senior Theses. Paper 830.

URL     [本文引用: 2]

According to self-expansion theory, there is an innate drive to gain new resources, identities, and perspectives, which causes people to seek and maintain interpersonal relationships. However, an individual’s relationship partners may come into conflict with each other. In the current research, 656 adults in established monogamous romantic relationships completed an online questionnaire about romantic partners asking them to give up a friendship. The researcher explored the prevalence of this friendship interference phenomenon and its relationship to sources of self-expansion. The amount of self-expansion provided by a friendship was manipulated through vignettes. Additional measures assessed the relationship between amount of self-expansion provided by the partner and gained independently as well as desire for self-expansion on willingness to give up the proposed friendship. Further measures assessed whether a current or previous partner had requested a friendship termination, partner’s reasoning given for the request, whether the participant acquiesced to the request, and the degree to which the request contributed to break-up.Results showed that about 1/3 of people had been asked by a romantic partner to terminate a friendship, with 73% asked acquiescing to a current partner’s request, and 34% acquiescing to a previous partner’s request. Contrary to what was predicted, no gender difference was found for rate of acquiescence to partner’s request for friendship termination. Sexual orientation, age, and desire for self-expansion significant predicted willingness to give up a friendship. Additionally, participants were mostly willing to give up the friendship when their partnership was highly self-expanding but the friendship was not, and willingness declined when the friendship was highly self-expanding, regardless of how self-expanding the partnership.

White, A.M. ( 2006).

'you've got a friend': African american men's cross-sex feminist friendships and their influence on perceptions of masculinity and women

Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, 23( 4), 523-542.

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White, R.W. ( 1959).

Motivation reconsidered: The concept of competence

Psychological Review, 66( 5), 297-333.

URL     PMID:13844397      [本文引用: 1]

WHITE RW.

Cook, W. L, &Kenny, D.A . ( 2005).

The actor-partner interdependence model: A model of bidirectional effects in developmental studies

International Journal of Behavioral Development, 29( 2), 101-109.

URL     [本文引用: 2]

The actor-partner interdependence model (APIM) is a model of dyadic relationships that integrates a conceptual view of interdependence with the appropriate statistical techniques for measuring and testing it. In this article we present the APIM as a general, longitudinal model for measuring bidirectional effects in interpersonal relationships. We also present three different approaches to testing the model. The statistical analysis of the APIM is illustrated using longitudinal data on relationship specific attachment security from 203 mother-adolescent dyads. The results support the view that interpersonal influence on attachment security is bidirectional. Moreover, consistent with a hypothesis from attachment theory, the degree to which a child's attachment security is influenced by his or her primary caregiver is found to diminish with age.

Xu X., Aron A., Westmaas J. L., Wang J., & Sweet L. H . ( 2014).

An fmri study of nicotine-deprived smokers' reactivity to smoking cues during novel/exciting activity

Plos One, 9( 4), e94598.

URL     PMID:24727905      [本文引用: 1]

Engaging in novel/exciting ( elf-expanding ) activities activates the mesolimbic dopamine pathway, a brain reward pathway also associated with the rewarding effects of nicotine. This suggests that self-expanding activities can potentially substitute for the reward from nicotine. We tested this model among nicotine-deprived smokers who, during fMRI scanning, played a series of two-player cooperative games with a relationship partner. Games were randomized in a 2 (self-expanding vs. not) x 2 (cigarette cue present vs. absent) design. Self-expansion conditions yielded significantly greater activation in a reward region (caudate) than did non-self-expansion conditions. Moreover, when exposed to smoking cues during the self-expanding versus the non-self-expanding cooperative games, smokers showed less activation in a cigarette cue-reactivity region, a priori defined [temporo-parietal junction (TPJ)] from a recent meta-analysis of cue-reactivity. In smoking cue conditions, increases in excitement associated with the self-expanding condition (versus the non-self-expanding condition) were also negatively correlated with TPJ activation. These results support the idea that a self-expanding activity promoting reward activation attenuates cigarette cue-reactivity among nicotine-deprived smokers. Future research could focus on the parameters of self-expanding activities that produce this effect, as well as test the utility of self-expansion in clinical interventions for smoking cessation.

Xu X., Lewandowski G. W., & Aron A . ( 2016).

The self- expansion model and optimal relationship development

Positive Approaches to Optimal Relationship Development, 79-100.

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